Battle Of The Band Babes: Liam Vs. Greg

I don’t care if you think this column is wrong.

I don’t care if it’s disrespectful. That’s because through the power of the internet, I can remain completely anonymous.

This week, we match a tour manager against a girl who can swallow gallons at a time: The best ladies of two members of The Dillinger Escape Plan.

Frontman Greg Puciato could kick your ass and probably mine too. That’s why he’s got such a super hot girl.

The man also must be very confident, because I own DVDs with his girlfriend doing wonderful things with cocks of all colors, and Greg doesn’t care.

That is admirable. Remember: I’m a drunk, so for me to think that’s admirable must mean it is admirable.

Jenna Haze is a gorgeous girl.

I remember when she first came on the porn scene, I thought, “That girl is too good looking to be doing this.”

She has a gorgeous face and a flawless body. Greg is a very, very lucky man.

So is Liam Wilson, who dates Dillinger’s tour manager, Jess.

That means Liam gets to go on the road with his girl, which few musicians get to do. That also means he can’t cheat — one of the only perks of being a rocker who tours a lot.

Jess (who I could find no bikini shots of) is one of those natural beauties you splurge on.

I’d take her to Sizzler on a Friday for the buffet. Sizzler’s salad spit guards are among the very best I have scene. Then, I’d try to take her home for cookies and milk.

Liam landed a hottie, too. And an earner, no less.

This is a tough one: Bad girl, or good girl? This is the decision in front of you.

Which girl would you let on the bus for a party? Which of these band babes would you want to go on a three-week vacation to Bali with?

I do not envy your dilemma.

Also, if you have any suggestions for future Band Babes, please leave them in the comments section following this article. Or you can email Harris with your suggestions.

I know I am a classless piece of shit and that I am going to hell, and I’m cool with that. The drinks and drugs are better down there.

So vote.

We can’t pick a winner without your assistance.

Think with your Woodrows, and make your choice!

Note: There is a poll embedded within this post, please visit the site to participate in this post's poll.

The post Battle Of The Band Babes: Liam Vs. Greg appeared first on Gunshy Assassin.